I totally decided to take a week off to realign my priorities. I had everything backwards. First it was me time, then it was my kids, then it was Jason, my husband. This was all over the place. So I decided to take a week off from blogging to decide the kind of me, wife, and mother I intend to spend the rest of my life being. I didn't like how the stresses of being a stay at home mom weighed on my shoulders.
First off, to whomever thinks this job is easy, I extend this sentiment: It ain't bon bons and soap operas, sweetheart. And if you quit your job to live this life, there are certain pointers and guidelines you should definitely follow before you clap your hands in the air above your head and dive in.
So I present to you these pointers on being a stay at home mom [or SAHM] while keeping your sense of self and sanity all while still giving your husband [and yourself] the love and affection deserved. I'll give you a couple pointers a day or so as well as assignments. A little at a time though... I mean come on, I
am a little busy here! :)
Have a budget and stick to it:
I was such a fly by the seat of my pants girl. I would just up and grab my purse and join a gym, or go to the mall and drop a hundred bucks or go buy a Juicy Couture treasure that would end up in a corner of my closet! Ugh, I miss those days but I don't sometimes. It's such a glass of ice water in the face when you live SO selfishly and then WHAM! Two little helpless sweethearts that depend on you! It ain't easy being on one income these days either.
I am completely blessed with family and friends that will watch the boys while I go grocery shopping and if this is a blessing you have, cash it in. You are twice as likely to blow your grocery budget with little ones in your cart because you are rushing! Did you know that? You aren't reviewing coupons. You aren't comparing prices, and you for SURE aren't reviewing your list. My advice: Maybe go to Food Max instead of Safeway. I conducted an experiment once, I brought my essentials list to Food Max one trip, and Safeway another. $120 compared to $260!! Same stuff. Okay I bought some extras like detergent and Kleenex but NOTHING that warranted an extra $140 bucks!! This wasn't diamond Kleenex for cryin' out loud!
This goes for clothing as well, sorry girls. No more Prada and Gucci! I never bought that expensive crap anyways. I don't go to Nordstrom anymore, and I don't miss it one bit either! I am now all about Ross, Marshalls, and TJ Maxx! I also found and adore my local consignment stores for my kids. Never push your nose up at hand me downs! Why go to Janie and Jack on one income. I'm sorry if I sound judgmental, but paying $25 bucks for a pair of jeans for a one year old?? A $20 dollar onesie my newborn is going to shit himself in?! Are you JOKING right now?? I shop at the Walmart and Target. Even my discount stores sell great stuff for kids. I buy outfits that won't make me cringe when they squirt go-gurt all over the front of it. Messes happen! Don't dress your kids in expensive clothes if they are home playing and learning all day, who are you trying to impress?? Caillou and Elmo don't care!
Your SAHM assignment: Make your weekly budget on Sunday night {after bath, book, cuddle, and bed of course} Look through your cupboards and your fridge & freezer. Make a list,check it twice. Maybe reserve clothing purchases for upcoming events or once a month. It's a tough adjustment, but when buying for 4 [yes counting spouses AND kids] when you're used to shopping for YOU YOU YOU, it's a rude awakening, for sure, but very do-able!
Tip of the day: Try cooking casseroles and crock pot meals instead of being unprepared and ordering a pizza. That way you save money AND have lunch for the next day! By deciding what's going on the table that night at around 1 or 2pm, you're less likely to be a frantic mess come dinner time. It's as simple as this: at 2pm-ish "Hmm, tonight I'll make tacos, I have the stuff for it." Then take the ground beef you sectioned off from buying bulk [we'll talk about this later] from the freezer, and go about your day.
See a pattern? Yes! This is all about planning! Making a plan and sticking to it, in more ways than just a budget, will make your job a lot easier! Your job is important! Make that your new mantra when you get frazzled, which happens A LOT!
Till Tomorrow-ish.
Bekki
